Romanticized Ideas of Man
I was watching this show on TV that basically suggested, women have these romanticized ideas of what they want in a man that include standards that no man can live up to. Is that true?
I think about myself and I pretty much know what I want and have come to accept that no man is going to be “perfect” and have ALL the characteristics that I want: A 6’2, chocolate man, with a dazzling smile, who completely adores me hehehe. I’ve been conditioned…. That’s not really what my list consists of, but you get the point. The top three things on a lot of women’s list are tall, dark, and handsome. Why do we do that?
Men probably have big butt and a smile that comes on a woman who can cook.
Does this set relationships up for failure?
Ladies want someone who can sing… someone who sends flowers… someone who she can talk to all night until she falls asleep… someone who is successful… someone who is so romantic all of her friends secretly hate her…
Why not want someone who likes you and all your weirdness? You could end up with someone who disrespects you, cheats on you, abuses, and puts you last.
Sometimes I look at couples, especially weird looking ones, and wonder what they see in each other. Did they settle? Was this a compromise? Did they not want to be alone? Were they tired of meeting the wrong people? So instead of tall, dark, and handsome… he’s short, pasty, and 15 years your senior… Does there come an age when you have to say, ok, let’s get it together?
As much as people say that they want happiness, they really don’t. People say things that they want, but then when they get it, it’s like ehhhh. I know, I’ve done it. I met someone who used to bring me roses and I didn’t really care, BUT I didn’t like him for many other reasons. I say this to say, he got no points for the roses. I love roses. I have them tattooed on my back for goodness sakes.
Niecy Nash said, “Date for you priorities, not your preferences.”
“Those who hold out for everything, end up with nothing.” I heard this on a TV show.
I’m finally seeing someone, after three years of being single, and I’m in the rose colored glasses stage. I can admit, I’m scared about when they come off. Will my romanticized ideas change things? Once, one of my friends asked me why I hadn’t asked him something, I don’t even remember what she asked specifically, but my response was that I don’t want things to change. Some things you really don’t need to know!! I didn’t want to know the answer to whatever the question was because if I didn’t like the answer from the man that I’m seeing, things would change. The answer could potentially knock the glasses from my face and into the street in the midst of rush hour traffic on a busy highway. Maybe, I’m not scared about the glasses per se. Maybe, I’m scared that I finally met someone that I like and that he may not live up to my romanticized ideas. On the other hand, what if he does and I’m scared for nothing…I digress
Maybe that’s why some women have so called unreasonable standards. If no man can meet them, we can’t be disappointed. It’s a mechanism. I don’t know, whatever. Anyway, all of this from a TV show and my boring weekend that allowed me to think too much. This is what happens when I have too much time alone with my thoughts. Right now, I am happy with my average height, light skin, and handsome man :-). That is all that matters.
Ladies and gentlemen, let’s not be crazy! I’m trying not to lol. In 2014, I will not over analyze, I will go with the flow, and be happy in the moment.
Happy New Year!!