MyPuzzlePeace: Piecing It Together

From the Inside In

Archive for the month “May, 2013”

13 Places to Meet Men – Whatcha Think?!

Happy Hump Day Everyone!!!!

I always enjoy reading articles by Paul Carrick Brunson, the Modern Day Matchmaker, he provides such good advice and gives me hope that I will find love. He has an article 13 Proven Places to Meet Men, I clearly must not frequent the right places because I never meet anyone.

1. Church – I have been tossing this idea around, but don’t want to be the heathen in church just to find a man lol. Now, I do want to go to church because I feel that I need to and God is important to me, but I feel guilty that there is a bit of an agenda behind it – finding a man. This next statement may sound horrible but, I don’t want a man who is too “churchy”. I already told you the 10 rules a preacher provided about dating :-|. He also felt like couples should have a chaperone when out on a date!! I don’t think so. Hey, it may work for some people, just not me.

2. Sports Teams- Eeehhh not interested… although it would be good exercise.

3. Hobby and Volunteer Groups – This is a pretty good idea!! The company that I work for offers a lot of volunteer opportunities; I should attend some. Support a cause you care about and mingle. As far as hobbies, I’m thinking about joining a running group… that would also work for sports team, hey twofer!!!

4. Around the Neighborhood – Not my neighborhood … Wait, I do think my neighbor is pretty good looking hhmm

5. Introduced by Family – I’m open to this… My mom kind of introduced me to a guy, but he was too young and too much of an alpha male (his words, not mine), I already felt the issues and we only had one conversation!! A headache I don’t need. What he said that turned me off: “… tell your friend that there is a new sheriff in town…” he may have been joking, but I didn’t like it. He thought I was out with guys because I said I was out with a friend. He should not have assumed. It made me think he would be jealous and possessive!!

6. Large Social Events – The article mentioned the Essence Festival, which I wanted to go to, but no one else did. Tampa has events too, it just seems that everyone is coupled up at them.

7. Someone You’ve Known Since Childhood – I rarely see people that I’ve known since childhood, although I’ve been on a role lately. I saw a guy I grew up with in the grocery store and a guy I went to high school with on a cruise. Ohh I went on a cruise, let’s call it a date in Cozumel!! I had a great time!!

8. A Public Space – Grocery store, gas station, etc… This can happen. Remember the guy in the mall? I also met someone at Target once, but he looked too old. I could probably meet more people, but sometimes when I’m in the grocery store I’m in a zone with headphones in, which me unapproachable 😦

9. At College – Been there done that. No more education for me, let’s see how far my Masters gets me. So far it isn’t working lol j/k kinda

10. At a House Party or Social Gathering – He discusses Flow Dating, which is supposed to be more interesting than speed dating. Two of my friends tried speed dating last weekend and one of them is going out tonight with someone that she met!! I wish her luck.

11. Introduced by a Friend – I trust my friends, but considering we’re all single… this won’t happen. If she doesn’t want him, I probably won’t either.

12. At the Bar or Club – I don’t know about the club, but definitely happy hour. My guy doesn’t like going to the club! I know I shouldn’t judge because if I’m there, he can be there, but I don’t go often… Brunson found that 18.8% of couples met in the club. I wish I knew the age group of the 18%, that makes a big difference.

13. On the Job – this may very well be true. Brunson found that 20.2 % met on the job. There are men at my job that I see are on the same dating sites that I was on. So we are right under each other’s noses and just don’t realize it. We all need to get to volunteering!! The job may also be too close, unless you work for a large company. Luckily for me, I DO!!

These are pretty reasonable places; guess I just need to keep my eye peeled.
I have a date on Saturday so I’m still pretty active, hopefully someone turns into something more. I’ll keep you posted.



My Educational Weekend

Happy Hump Day!!!

I went to a day party this weekend and had a great time!!!!! I need to attend more!!

Recently, one of my male friends told me that I am unapproachable. I hear this often, although I’m not sure why I am unapproachable generally speaking. Saturday at the day party, I was conscious of my actions to learn why I am unapproachable at a party. Let me first say that I know that I am unapproachable when I go to the club; it’s intentional. I really don’t want anyone talking to me… but, maybe if I am more approachable in one setting then I’ll be more approachable in ALL settings. So these are the things I noticed that I do.

1. I make faces when I see something crazy. I know it’s not nice to judge, but sometimes people wear the craziest things!!!! I mean just downright WRONG, but like I said who am I to judge. My face doesn’t know that though… I swear it has a mind of its own. I think I get that from my mother. I’m working on this!! Keep a smile on my face at all times!!

2. I cross my arms. I know that closes me off, I’m working on it. It seems weird to just have my arms dangling, I don’t know. I guess I just need to keep a drink in my hand.

3. I am always standing in the back or the middle of my friends. I understand that a group of women can be intimidating to a man. We had a discussion about it at work one day. This guy likes my friend, but wouldn’t come to the table to speak to her with four other women at the table… that’s another story. I rarely go out alone, not to a party anyway, it’s generally four to five of us. I guess guys don’t want to get rejected in front of a group of women.

4. When I’m not in the back, I am standing with my back to the party facing my friends. I’m not sure why I do that, I’m usually just running my mouth or something. PROBLEM!!!! I already have my friends… I need to be facing the ACTION!

5. I don’t give eye contact; I look past people. Well sometimes I give eye contact. It really just depends. It seems when I give eye contact, the wrong person sees it!!! Saturday, I tried soooo hard to avoid this man’s gaze that it was awkward. Now I’m thinking, what if someone saw me breaking my neck to not acknowledge this man and thought that I was being rude.

So, I really paid attention to myself and learned a lot. I’m working on everything!!! The weird thing is, the type of guy that I like probably would never approach me anyway… well, maybe if I was off by myself he would. I’m not much for the smooth talkers, thanks to the frigg, I think they are full of shit!

So I am going to be a new approachable me! We’ll see how that works out… Maybe it’s not me being unapproachable, maybe it’s men being scared!! Hhmmm interesting!!


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