MyPuzzlePeace: Piecing It Together

From the Inside In

Archive for the month “March, 2013”

It’s A Wrap!

Hi everyone, I hope you have been having a wonderful and productive week.

This week officially wraps up my online experience, although I’ve been hidden for the past two weeks. I had two profiles one on BPM and the other on Match. The experience was interesting, but yeah interesting….

BPM was hilarious; I started off with a bang. I was looking through the “interested in” section where profiles are presented one by one and you decide, no you’re not interested – next profile or yes you are interested – next profile. Apparently I wasn’t paying much attention to what the choices actually were because in my mind there was a choice that just said, next profile. It was my first day and wasn’t ready to make any decisions, I was just browsing… Long story short, there is no such option and I sent out like 50 flirts before I realized what I was doing! My Ipad pings every time I get a message; I was sitting there wondering why I am getting so many emails… yeah… so that was funny… I felt really bad about it because I sent out these flirts and then I was ignoring the response.

The men on BPM were more entertaining than those on Match. I got invited to hedonism in Jamaica, I had an old man praise me for not letting any pretty boys knock me up, this guy and I had a “Who’s inbox is funnier” contest, and I conducted my arrogant experiment on this site… memories!! I had a lot more interaction on this site than I had on Match. I ended up exchanging numbers with four men and met one.

Match was more blah; it seemed that many people were not actively using it. I actually tried to close this profile within three days of opening it, but I couldn’t get a refund :-(. I would get matched with men who hadn’t been active in three or more weeks and that basically means inactive. The pool on this site seemed more limited; once I narrowed there weren’t many men left. My two friends and I had overlaps and were interacting with the same men, lol. On this site I did manage to exchange numbers with two men both of which I actually met.

All in all I had a pleasant experience, it was fun, and I laughed a lot (and not just at people). The men that I met face to face were nice and I wasn’t creeped out. What more could I ask for?

Within the same time frame, I didn’t meet any men in the “real” world. Well one guy told me I was cute and I should give him my number as he was trying to sell his CD’s outside of Crispers. No thank you young man, I can’t support a starving artist…
Would I do it again? Eehh I don’t know. I can’t say no, but can’t say yes. Hopefully after this experience I won’t have to 😉



Give Dough Boy A Chance!!??

You Incomplete MeHi everyone, I hope you had an amazing weekend. I sure did!

Today, I want to talk about a dilemma a friend of mine is having. My friend, Strawberry Mary, is single and ready to mingle. She tried online dating and met a few men, but nothing really came out of it. She said she is done with online dating, but also can’t seem to meet anyone in the real world.

She recently told me that she has a male friend, we’ll call him Dough Boy, which she has known for about 10 years. He has recently come back into her life and expressed an interest in pursuing a relationship with her. He is an attractive man, who seems to have himself together… Here is the dilemma… She feels there is no spark between them.

See Strawberry Mary has a type… she wants a man who is hard, not in a bitch where’s my dinner kinda way, but in a manly man alpha male kinda way. She thinks Dough Boy is too soft for her. She gave me two examples of what classifies him as soft; he cuts his shrimp and he cuts his corn off the cobb… sooooo… One of my other friends said that he may have had braces which is why he doesn’t bite into things! I think Strawberry Mary is just nitpicking… You know when you don’t like someone and EVERYTHING they do it annoys you? OMG stop breathing so hard and sucking up all the air!! I think it’s one of those situations.

I think that she may need to step outside of her box. Try something new. It’s clear he has feelings for her. No, he may not be the alpha male of the year, but he may be a good man who will treat her with respect unlike some of the last fellas. Sometimes when you stray from your “type” you get the best relationships. I think that she should spend time with him and be open to the potential of what if… she may be pleasantly surprised. She could be the Yin to his Yang. No point in having two alphas in a relationship. It’s not like he cries at Publix commercials or anything! I definitely don’t think she should settle or attempt to force anything, that wouldn’t be fair to either one of them, but what’s wrong with giving it a chance? A Fair Chance!

I don’ know, that’s my two cents. What do you guys think? Should she give him a chance?

I’m in a Lovey Dovey Mood!!


I was going through my old computer to move files to my new computer and came across two short poems that I wrote years ago. They were intended to be a part of a series, but somewhere along the way I lost my motivation, hopefully I get it back…

I’m in a pretty lovey dovey mood, not sure why, probably because we can no longer listen to iheart radio at work so I’m stuck listening to the love songs I have on my phone… or not… why speculate 😉


Your soul is the mate to mine

Connected spiritually with God’s blessing

They bind together forever

To create perfect harmony

To the hummed melody

Of our hearts’ song

That played in the streets of heaven

Where the Lord created

My soul to mate yours



Your heart speaks to mine

In a language only we can understand

Sharing secrets only we can know

Your words penetrate my soul

Uniting our minds in spirit

In an eternal dance of joy

Only we can join



No More Dating Games!

Hi everyone! I hope all is well. I think I lost 10lbs, but I could’ve possibly gained 10lbs, or maybe my weight didn’t move at all and my scale is just broken!! Who knows! My scale reads something different every time I get on and I just take the best number as accurate lol!

So the other day I was talking to my male friend Dew Dew, gotta love the nick names lol… Wait let me rewind and come back to this.

So as those you who have been following my blog know, this year I have been actively dating after a two year hiatus and the end of a four year relationship. It’s been fun and aggravating all at the same time. Since I haven’t dated in years, I’ve been reading several books, blogs, and articles on dating to get filled in on the new new.

Rewind a bit more…

I went to a singles retreat last year hosted by a church. The pastor mentioned that he did not like Steve Harvey’s book. He felt like the book was teaching people how to play a game and relationships should not be viewed as a game… I don’t remember what else he said and I didn’t necessarily agree with what he said… He lost me somewhere along the way when he shared the 10 rules of dating. I’ll tell you briefly. 1. No sex 2. No Sex 3. No Sex 4. No Sex 5. No Sex 6. No Sex 7. No Sex 8. No sex 9. No Sex 10. No Sex. So there you go!!! Now, I’m not suggesting that you should have sex, but…

Fast forward…

I have been reading “Unmask the Male Mind” by Alexandra Fox. This is a book that I’ve mentioned before, she suggests women to implement the rotation system when dating. The book has a section about what men are supposed to do and what women are supposed to do. Fox says, until a relationship has been established that women should never call men. She said when she was dating, to avoid calling a man she would actually delete his number from her phone and call log as well as delete any text. She figured if he was interested in talking to her that he would call.

This brings us to present. I asked my friend Dew Dew if it’s ok to call a man you’re interested in. His response, “if you want to talk to him just call.” He thinks you shouldn’t be obsessive and stalkerish, but if you want to talk, just call.

Then it hit me!! This is what the pastor was talking about. Why do we play all these silly little games? What is wrong with calling? The phone works both ways! If I’m thinking about a man that I’m interested in during the day, what’s the issue with sending a message just to say, “I hope you are having a good day”? Any man that runs because he crossed my mind, is not worth my time!!

And another thing!! I don’t want to put men on rotation!! I want to date one man at the time and if that doesn’t work out, move on to the next one. I’m pretty charming. As of March 8, Check In has viewed my profile 26 times!!! I’ve never even met him. So can you imagine if I graced him with my presence?!?!? I’d never be able to shake him!! Lol, I’m being silly, but it’s just not me. I get attached, he gets attached and now I have to break someone’s heart. No Bueno!!

So thank you Dew Dew for helping me reach this epiphany. From now on, I’m going to do what I want and what I think feels right for ME. If it works, it works. If it doesn’t, better luck next time!


My Proven Theory!

Good evening world!

I have a well thought out theory about men whose profile consists of pictures with no shirt and men who pose with cars. I suggest there is a positive correlation. The more pictures they have, the more arrogant they are. This is very scientific people!! Ok, it isn’t really scientific, but I swear it’s true.

I was chatting with one man online who had several pictures with no shirt on. He wasn’t even in great shape. So he must really be full of himself.  In addition to the topless pix he had a couple of him posing with and in a car. Ohhh ohhh AND he had to nerve to say something like chillin’ in the Range. He needed to let us know what kind of vehicle it was. My eyes nearly rolled out of my head. Who does that???? Apparently him!! I had to continue with this, you know, for research sake. I sent him a flirt and hoped my appearance was up to his standards. He got back to me eventually and apologized for the delay, he was traveling for business. Yeah, ok, whatever you say!

Here’s my collected data!

1. We were messaging each other. I asked what he had done for the weekend. His response, shopping as usual. He’s trying to let me know he has money, if that’s not arrogance I don’t know what is!

2. In one of his messages to me he said he…  “doesn’t do sneaker wearing nappy headed lil girls.” Those who know me, know that tidbit did not sit will me with. Ugh, he is exuding arrogance!!

3. He referred to himself as a big fish. OMG, I was really getting annoyed with him at this point.

4. He asked my name, I told him and asked for his. His response, are you even reading my messages? Apparently he gave me his name a week ago. Look, I don’t have to remember your name from a week ago!!! Get it together, you’re not the only person I talk to.

5. My last important piece of data… he states he has less than 1% baggage and doesn’t know why he is still single. Who the heck states they don’t know why they are still single on a dating site. If you were that much of a catch, you’d have someone. Clearly it’s something Mr. Big Fish. If you want to really know, I can fill you in you arrogant pompous jerk!

Men, let’s make good choices! You actually look stupid when you just have random photos with no shirt on. It’d be one thing if you were at the beach or playing basketball, but to take a photo of yourself standing in your bathroom with no shirt on… WHY!?!? It says something and it isn’t positive!

SN. I looked at another man’s profile and he had a picture of his torso, his freaking face wasn’t even in the picture. He sent me a message and asked if I didn’t like his photos. I said if you really want to know… lmao… never hear from him again!! Truth hurts!!

I think my theory stands firm. Random sampling, blah blah blah. Let’s just say, I’m right!

Knock it off fellas!!


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